I’m starting to feel like home is a suffocating place.
Because, here at home i feel confined to think and reminisce the memories we had, the times we spent on the couch laughing,talking, playing video games…Home is where I am surrounded by the clothes I wore when I was with you, the big bear you bought me for valentines, the balloon…and home is where we began. The first kiss, the talking, the late nights…the happiest moments of my life and then the worst.
One thing that follows me where ever I go, is the emptiness I feel in my chest.
I get tempted to call you, to text you…because here i am wondering what you’re doing. Wondering what you’re feeling, if you’re hurt as much as I am. It’s day one, I cried in the shower…at least the only thing that made me think I was crying was the fact that i could feel a stab at my chest.
I have to get used to not having you around every day now.
In my head as i sit here with a broken heart,
I think about all the guys that have potential, the only problem.
THEY are NOT YOU.
The tears are forcing their way out, but I’m trying just as hard to keep them in. Maybe crying will help me feel better, but I’ve done it all…I’ve cried in sadness, screamed in anger… and as much as I wish i didn’t feel the way I did…I cant take back the fact that I love this guy.
and now…it’s all gone.
I can keep saying that things will change, I can make promises that this time will be better, but you can only say and do so much before it stops meaning anything more than JUST WORDS.
I am still here…
Keeping a small piece of happiness that was once “US”.
I’ll never regret anything, from this experience, i learned to cherish, to have patience, to never give anyone your everything until the other person is willing to do the same.
phasing in, phasing out.
I’m on the edge of tears. I’m on the edge of insanity.
Most of all… I’m broken in shards.
My boyfriend is getting me my 12 piece make up brush set! :D
Of course, now i have to go Download…
- Underworld:Rise of the Lycans
and then take him to go watch…